Music is the silence between the notes, the French composer Claude Debussy said… so the true song is in the “rests.”
Yet in our everyday busyness, the fundamental nature of the rest often is overlooked. Our lives become as garbled as a ballad played at top speed, devoid of the pauses so essential to its beauty.
How can we make room in our lives to restore those pauses? One way is to go on a personal retreat. Unlike vacations (which sometimes create more stress than they relieve), a personal retreat provides an opportunity for deep rest and reflection, helping to renew the body, mind, heart and spirit. As life coach Vidya Carolyn Dell’uomo, a founding member of the retreat site Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health in Massachusetts, put it, “Vacations are about external sightseeing, but a personal retreat is about internal sightseeing.”
What to expect on a retreat: Centers for retreats usually are located in nonurban areas away from the bustle of everyday life. Though some retreat centers cater to groups (families, corporations), the idea of the personal retreat is to focus on yourself as an individual.
Personal retreats fall into two basic categories — structured and unstructured (also called directed and self-directed). A structured retreat typically includes guided activities, such as yoga classes, meditation, breath work, journal writing and dream boards (a visual representation of hopes and dreams created with pictures and cutouts). Dell’uomo recommended choosing a structured program for your first retreat so that you have some guidance on how to get the most out of the experience. Later, you may wish to try an unstructured retreat.
Consider how much time you can devote to your retreat — a day, several days, a week or more. Keep in mind: “It takes time to ‘settle’ — to acclimate to a new pace. By the middle of a longer retreat, a deepening occurs… the retreat takes on a life of its own… and insights arise from a well deep within,” Dell’uomo said.
To find a retreat, ask friends for recommendations or surf the Web. [Editor’s note: An online resource such as www.RetreatFinder.com lets you search by location, environment (desert, mountain, rain forest), focus (wellness, arts, women only) and other criteria.] To get a better sense of which retreat would be best for you, identify several possibilities and then call the centers to ask about their programs, accommodations, philosophy and prices.
Retreat costs vary greatly depending on duration, location and activities. Dell’uomo said, “It may not be true, in the case of retreats, that you get what you pay for. Some high-end retreats occur in lush settings with spa facilities, and if pampering is what you are looking for, these may be worth your money. Other retreats, especially those at spiritual centers, may have simpler accommodations and amenities yet provide a guided experience in self-reflection that is worth its weight in gold.”
The best part about taking a retreat is what happens afterward. Dell’uomo pointed out, “A personal retreat paves the way for integrating into your daily life the practices that sustain and nourish the peace and balance that we all long for.”
